Our habits define us, knowingly or unknowingly we all have some habits that make us look nervous and less confident. In this personality development training video by Meera you will learn about these basic habits and how to improve on them so that you don’t look under-confident and a nervous jerk. We this personal development videos would help you overcome communication mistakes and body language errors that are barrier to look confident. Let us know in the comments, how you found this video and give it a thumbs up if you find it useful.
Complete Video Transcript : –
Hey everybody, welcome back to Skillopedia you are with me, Meera. Well guys, I agree that feeling uncomfortable or nervous in social situations is absolutely natural, it happens to all of us. I mean come on, I can’t say that no you can’t be nervous before your stage show or meeting new people or a job interview or maybe even your first date… you know we find ourselves in nervous situations when we forget names while introducing to people, putting words in the right place, simply making a good impression, right, isn’t it? It happens. But guys the thing is, in situations such as a job interview or a meeting, huge seminars, being in front of clients and new customers, while networking, college fests… all these habits need to be dialed down a bit, because people take cues from our habits, our body language, our words and form a judgment like, “oh yeah, he’s fine but I think he isn’t confident enough to take up the responsibility yet.” But if we know exactly what we behave or how we behave in such situations, then we can control it, we can learn that helped us control our behavior in such situations, so that we look absolutely charming and confident. Now the good thing is, is that these can be controlled, when you are aware which habits of yours need to be worked on. So guys let’s see which are these habits that make you look nervous and less confident in front of others.
Guys when you are in a room full of people and you need to introduce yourself, are you shaking your hands in a very weak manner and introducing yourself in a soft, very, very soft tone or voice? Or when you’re asked a certain question you happen to answer in a soft voice, the voice like you’re scared and you’re hiding something, like a dark secret or something. If yes, then this is making people think that you are under confident and you don’t know what you’re saying, right? Imagine this, imagine if I was talking to you in such a soft tone, would you believe me? Would you learn something out of it? No. So it makes me look under confident and my sentences don’t hold any value. So maybe have a soft tone that’s also polite but try to throw your voice and not your nervousness on people. For example, “hi, I’m Meera”, “I am, hi I’m Meera” or “hi, I’m Meera”, now obviously one was a soft tone and the other one was a scared tone, so if your voice sounds like the scared one, well it’s your choice literally what you want to sound like.
Now you might know many people or probably you might have the same habit, a habit of hiding or lying small little things that really don’t matter. Things which are harmless, for instance someone asks, “hey, what did you have for lunch?” and you say, “oh, nothing much just a salad.” even though you had a whole sandwich and a pasta. Doesn’t it sound really stupid to you? Yes. They are harmless lies as long, and they’re also known as white lies. Now even if by mistake that same friend asks you later, “hey, where did you order the salad from, was it good?” “do you think I should order the same?” Now because you have said something stupid, a stupid lie before, you will have to take it to a next level and just lie again. This was seriously make you look less confident every time you meet your friend. Guys just try to be honest, open and genuine and don’t be afraid of what others will think of you and judge you. You will slowly become confident and gain confidence once you start just being open and genuine.
So guys now try to remember a situation specially maybe in an elevator, when you were with a few people, there is a weird silence, some of us have a tendency to move our legs, maybe cough or look at our phones and just try to remove that awkward silence, don’t we? Or maybe when we are, when you’re with your family and friends and you have guests at home, you tend to crack a joke or break the awkward silence which may not even be that funny yeah, yeah? We don’t need to do all this guys, we don’t need to get such moments out of our lives. So guys remember that even if you stand quietly or sit quietly without cracking a joke it’s also a sign of being confident and shows that you’re comfortable in your own skin and I want you to know this already and not take these silences the wrong way.
Guys so here is another incident, it’s an incident of a boy, who was in my class and he was a class hopper, he was always ranked number one in class but when people and parents and students went to him to complement him, to tell him, wish him good luck, he used to just say, “oh, I don’t think it was that good” and he used to just brush it off. Now that showed that although he was good in Math or studies, he wasn’t so comfortable in social situations. You may think, he was just being humble but you’re actually showing that you are a little embarrassed of what you’re doing or how people are complimenting you. Appreciate your good qualities, you guys and accept wishes and good wishes with a simple ‘thank you’. If anyone complements me, I like to say, ‘thank you, you made my day.’ This makes me feel good as well as the other person as well. So accept complements by just thanking others, yeah, will you do that now?
Alright guys, so here is the thing, it’s okay to seek advice and opinion from people but do you find yourself asking for advice and opinion from almost everyone and all the time? If you are, if you buy a new dress, okay? Do you ask someone’s opinion all the time like, “hey, does this look good on me?” “are you sure it looks good on me?” “are you sure I don’t look bad?” Now over a period of time people are going to get sick of it. People are just going to think, why is she not confident? People have a strong point of view guys and they end up judging. So maybe you can ask once or twice but try not asking all the time and from everyone around you, alright?
Since childhood, we all have this particular habit in common, any guesses which one? We constantly have a habit of comparing ourselves to others. Now guys I literally see this happening everywhere around us. You know things like, how many followers I have versus how many followers Samantha has, how many likes she has versus how many likes I have, why does my boss give him the project, why does he not choose me? What do I have, what do I don’t have that he or she has… Just cribbing all the time and comparing all the time and talking about others, just lowers our confidence and I want you to know that. Try to accept the competition around you and become even more hard-working like, “oh, she did it so well, let me see how well I can do this” or how I can do it in a different way because remember you are unique in your own way, you do things in your own way.
Now since I have spoken about Instagram, whenever we are low on confidence or nervous, we find ourselves just continuously fidgeting with something or the other. I’m sure you all have like, clicking pens or checking your phones or touching your hair or your glasses or biting your nails… I mean come on, you don’t need to do all that, you don’t need to be reminded that stop fidgeting with yourselves when you’re nervous. Fidgeting is absolutely, it shows the sign of the most under confident person and people get the signs immediately.
Also make sure that you don’t have a closed body language, with your shoulders being shrugged, back being hunched, always try to keep your shoulders wide and open, back up straight and hands folded only when necessary like this, not all the time, right? I’m sure you have marked these few habits of yours and you know where you’re going nervous and being fidgety. So I want you to start working on it, because I want you to be confident and look confident and be super, super powerful with your own skin, with yourself, right? Great guys, I’m sure you all have considered some or the other tips which are being useful to you, which are going to be helpful for your future presentation, your stage performance, whatever it may be. But make sure that you take these tips and work on them from now. Well that’s all for the day guys, I will see you very soon with another video very soon. Okay, keep smiling, be confident, this is me Meera, signing off for the day. Bye.